8964 與沁園春 長沙

《沁園春 長沙》
1925年10月 毛澤東

獨立寒秋，湘江北去，橘子洲頭。
看萬山紅遍，層林盡染，漫江碧透，百舸爭流。
鷹擊長空，魚翔淺底，萬類霜天競自由。
悵寥廓，問蒼茫大地，誰主沉浮？

攜來百侶曾遊，憶往昔崢嶸歲月稠。
恰同學少年，風華正茂，書生意氣，揮斥方遒。
指點江山，激揚文字，糞土當年萬戶侯。
曾記否，到中流擊水，浪遏飛舟？

Other Men - Sara Teasdale

WHEN I talk with other men 

 I always think of you --

Your words are keener than their words,

And they are gentler, too.

When I look at other men,

I wish your face were there,

With its gray eyes and dark skin

And tossed black hair.

When I think of other men,

Dreaming alone by day,

The thought of you like a strong wind

Blows the dreams away.

喜歡 Sara Teasdale 也是因爲您，她的詩句總會讓我想起您。

 

您和她一起出席周末的慈善餐舞會，我倒奇怪我心裏沒有甚麽異議，還主動跟她握手寒暄，離開時您對我示意要走了，笑得滿滿的，暖暖的。

 

我沒有告訴過您，您笑的時候很好看，讓我心生溫暖。

饒孟侃的詩〈走〉

 
張曼娟貼文
 
饒孟侃的詩〈走〉:
「我為你造船不惜匠工，
我為你三更天求著西北風，
只要你輕輕說一聲走，
桅杆上便立刻掛滿了帆蓬。」
...
你能這樣愛誰？
誰能這樣愛你?

據説上任不到一年，張老師要離任香港光華新聞文化中心主任一職，以上是她昨晚貼的。

Music I Heard

By Conrad Aiken

1889-1973

Music I heard with you was more than music,

And bread I broke with you was more than bread;

Now that I am without you, all is desolate;

All that was once so beautiful is dead.

Your hands once touched this table and this silver,

And I have seen your fingers hold this glass.

These things do not remember you, beloved, --

And yet your touch upon them will not pass.

For it was in my heart you moved among them,

And blessed them with your hands and with your eyes;

And in my heart they will remember always, --

They knew you once, O beautiful and wise.

這是閑來無事，在互聯網找到的，
美麗的事物，總是too beautiful too last。

If You Forget Me - Pablo Neruda

I want you to know

one thing.

You know how this is:

if I look

at the crystal moon, at the red branch

of the slow autumn at my window,

if I touch

near the fire

the impalpable ash

or the wrinkled body of the log,

everything carries me to you,

as if everything that exists,

aromas, light, metals,

were little boats

that sail

toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,

if little by little you stop loving me

I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly

you forget me

do not look for me,

for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,

the wind of banners

that passes through my life,

and you decide

to leave me at the shore

of the heart where I have roots,

remember

that on that day,

at that hour,

I shall lift my arms

and my roots will set off

to seek another land.

But

if each day,

each hour,

you feel that you are destined for me

with implacable sweetness,

if each day a flower

climbs up to your lips to seek me,

ah my love, ah my own,

in me all that fire is repeated,

in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,

my love feeds on your love, beloved,

and as long as you live it will be in your arms

without leaving mine

A小姐告訴我去年您家終於香燈有繼了，B小姐告訴我您請她參加兒子的百日宴，C小姐某天清晨上班時，在居所樓下碰到您，才知道您最近搬了家.....

當我必須從別人身上才能知道您的消息，就表示我跟您已經沒有「關係」了，我竟然想問您為甚麽不告訴我！？

我們不是朋友嗎？我們比朋友關係複雜，天知地知您知我知那樣子繼續下去是「應該「有害的，所以「注定」到頭來只能「變得」比朋友疏離。

好像除了我以外，全世界都很滿意這樣的安排。

無懼風雨 / 雨ニモマケズ / Ame ni mo Makezu

Re-post if you have someone in Heaven... ♥

I wish heaven had a phone so I could hear your voice again.

I thought of you today, but that is nothing new.

I thought about you yesterday, and days before that too.

I think of you in silence, I often speak your name.

All I have are memories & a picture in a frame.

Your memory is a keepsake, from which I'll never part.

God has you in his arms..., I have you in my heart.

Splendour in the Grass

Splendour in the Grass - William Wordsworth
What though the radiance
which was once so bright
Be now for ever taken from my sight,
Though nothing can bring back the hour
Of splendour in the grass,
of glory in the flower,
We will grieve not, rather find
Strength in what remains behind;
In the primal sympathy
Which having been must ever be;
In the soothing thoughts that spring
Out of human suffering;
In the faith that looks through death,
In years that bring the philosophic mind.

「我們，不要去羡慕别人所擁有的幸福。你以為你没有的，可能在來的路上，你以為他擁有的，可能在去的途中……有的人對你好，是因為你對他好。有的人對你好，是因為懂得你的好！」Facebook的一個朋友如是説，很有意思。

令我想起Pink Martini唱的Splendour in the Grass，知道那部1961年的同名電影中文名字叫做「天涯何處無芳草」，上面是片中主人公唸的詩句。

情愫相同，都是叫人忘記背後，努力面前，卻同樣難免唏噓。

I can see you're thinking baby
I've been thinking too
about the way we used to be
and how to start a new

Maybe I'm a hopeless dreamer
maybe I've got it wrong
but i'm going where the grass is green
if you like to come along

Back when i was starting out
I always wanted more
but every time I got it
I still felt just like before

Fortune is a fickle friend
I'm tired of chasing fate
and when I look into your eyes
I know you feel the same

All these years of living large
are starting to do a sin
I wont say it wasn't fun
but now it has to end

Life is moving oh so fast
I think we should take it slow
rest our heads upon the grass
and listen to it grow

Going where the hills are green
and the cars are few and far
days are full of splendor
and at night you can see the stars

Life's been moving oh so fast
I think we should take it slow
rest our heads upon the grass
and listen to it grow

對酒當歌

短歌行 - 曹操

對酒當歌，人生幾何？
譬如朝露，去日苦多。
慨當以慷，憂思難忘。
何以解憂，惟有杜康。
青青子衿，悠悠我心。
但為君故，沉吟至今。
呦呦鹿鳴，食野之苹。
我有嘉賓，鼓瑟吹笙。
明明如月，何時可掇？
憂從中來，不可斷絕。
越陌度阡，枉用相存。
契闊談讌，心念舊恩。
月明星稀，烏鵲南飛，
遶樹三匝，無枝可棲？
山不厭高。水不厭深。
周公吐哺。天下歸心。

您說欠我一頓慶祝生辰的晚餐，相約二月四日晚見面，我滿心歡喜的在意大利餐廳訂了位。

因爲想送您禮物，二月三日午飯之後，在設計師Dora Tam的陳列室買了這對用精鋼製成的袖口紐，職員說鋼的質地堅硬，很難做出精緻細微的東西。

然而天意不要我們再見面，那天我們不約而同的病了，然後我兩次帶它們飄洋過海，希望見到您時送給您，結果到現在還在我家。

我該如何處理分手以前買給您的禮物？我們本來去年十一月就分開了喔！如果把它們送給別人做抽獎禮物，我會希望知道誰抽到了，如果送給別人，那又不是真心要送給別人的禮物......

對酒當歌，人生幾何？如果去日真的苦多，現在應該高興才對？

我只是真的很喜歡這對紐扣！我還是很希望有天它們可以陪您對酒當歌。

畢竟，人生幾何！

Love Letter - Sylvia Plath

Not easy to state the change you made.

If I'm alive now, then I was dead,

Though, like a stone, unbothered by it,

Staying put according to habit.

You didn't just tow me an inch, no-

Nor leave me to set my small bald eye

Skyward again, without hope, of course,

Of apprehending blueness, or stars.

That wasn't it. I slept, say: a snake

Masked among black rocks as a black rock

In the white hiatus of winter-

Like my neighbors, taking no pleasure

In the million perfectly-chiseled

Cheeks alighting each moment to melt

My cheeks of basalt. They turned to tears,

Angels weeping over dull natures,

But didn't convince me. Those tears froze.

Each dead head had a visor of ice.

And I slept on like a bent finger.

The first thing I was was sheer air

And the locked drops rising in dew

Limpid as spirits. Many stones lay

Dense and expressionless round about.

I didn't know what to make of it.

I shone, mice-scaled, and unfolded

To pour myself out like a fluid

Among bird feet and the stems of plants.

I wasn't fooled. I knew you at once.

Tree and stone glittered, without shadows.

My finger-length grew lucent as glass.

I started to bud like a March twig:

An arm and a leg, and arm, a leg.

From stone to cloud, so I ascended.

Now I resemble a sort of god

Floating through the air in my soul-shift

Pure as a pane of ice. It's a gift.

我對Sylvia Plath 的認知有：她患有抑鬱症，她把自己的頭放入微波爐來自殺，她「曾是」詩人Ted Hughes的太太，說曾是是因爲後者為了Assia Wevill離開她，據説 Sylvia Plath自殺身亡六年以後，Assia Wevill也不得好死。

我有Ted Hughes 1998年出版的最後的詩集Birthday Letters，寫他和Sylvia Plath的複雜關係，滿紙低吟，實在不適合我這個悲觀的人閲讀，所以一直沒有讀完。

吊詭異的是，這詩使我想起盧巧音的「垃圾」。

如果我是半張廢紙　讓我　化蝶
如果我是個空罐子　為你　鐵了心

被你浪費　被你活埋
讓你愉快　讓我瓦解
為你盛放　頹廢中　那媚態

＊留我做個垃圾　長留戀於你家
從沉溺中結疤　再發芽
情愛就似垃圾　殘骸雖會腐化
庭園中最後也　開滿花

＃被世界遺棄　不可怕
喜歡你　有時還可怕
沒法再做那些牽掛
比不上　在你手中火化
不需要　完美得可怕
太快樂　如何招架　殘忍不好嗎

重唱　＊,＃,＃

灰燼裡　被徹底消化
我以後　全無牽掛　什麼都不怕

蘇東坡寓禪《如夢令》二首

其一
水垢何曾相受，細看兩俱無有。
寄語揩背人，盡日勞君揮肘。
輕手、輕手！居士本來無垢。

其二
自淨方能淨彼，我自汗流呀氣。
寄語澡浴人，且共肉身遊戲。
但洗、但洗！俯為人間一切。

好一句「自淨方能淨彼 ！」

Does It Matter?

Does it matter?-losing your legs?
For people will always be kind,
And you need not show that you mind
When others come in after hunting
To gobble their muffins and eggs.
Does it matter?-losing you sight?
There’s such splendid work for the blind;
And people will always be kind,
As you sit on the terrace remembering
And turning your face to the light.
Do they matter-those dreams in the pit?
You can drink and forget and be gald,
And people won't say that you’re mad;
For they know that you've fought for your country,
And no one will worry a bit.

在Yahoo輸入Does it matter，找到戰場詩人Siegfried Sassoon 擅長的冷嘲熱諷，反戰卻又回到戰場上，想到情場如戰場，想到我自己。

參戰的人應該明白不成功便成仁，輸不起的，都不值得可憐。

http://www.poemhunter.com/siegfried-sassoon/biography/

不負如來不負卿

曾慮多情損梵行，入山又恐別傾城；

世間安得雙全法，不負如來不負卿。
美人不是母胎生，應是桃花樹長成；

已恨桃花容易落，落花比你尚多情。

六世達賴喇嘛倉央嘉措在布達拉宮的寢宮裏，

懷念伊人而寫的情詩。

愛，或者不愛

你見，或者不見我
我就在那裏，不悲不喜
你念，或者不念我
情就在那裏，不來不去
你愛，或者不愛我
愛就在那裏，不增不減
你跟，或者不跟我
我的手就在你的手裏，不捨不棄
來我的懷裏
或者
讓我住進你的心裏
默然 相愛
寂靜 歡喜

昨晚收拾東西時看到這則剪報，今早無聊鑽進自己的博客看到它，發現2009年12月27日上載當天，沒有寫下甚麽，唸了一遍，突然想寫一點。

六世達賴的高尚灑脫情操，不是一般凡夫俗子可以做到，所以沒有默然相愛寂靜歡喜，至於那些「愛你愛到殺死你」，也不是傷春悲秋如我者能做到的轟烈。

我還在那裏握著你的手，不捨得你，同樣想走到你的懷裏，住進你的心裏，我只是默然想念，寂靜傷悲而已。

「世間安得雙全法，不負如來不負卿？」

http://blog.xuite.net/moonraining/blog/8359548

Each Man Kills The Thing He Loves

Yet each man kills the thing he loves
By each let this be heard,
Some do it with a bitter look,
Some with a flattering word,
The coward does it with a kiss,
The brave man with a sword!
Some kill their love when they are young,
And some when they are old;
Some strangle with the hands of Lust,
Some with the hands of Gold:
The kindest use a knife, because
The dead so soon grow cold.
Some love too little, some too long,
Some sell, and others buy;
Some do the deed with many tears,
And some without a sigh:
For each man kills the thing he loves,
Yet each man does not die.

Ballad of Reading Gaol

http://emotionalliteracyeducation.com/classic_books_online/rgaol10.htm

珍摩露在1982年的同志電影Querelle 唱的Each Man Kills The Thing He Loves，原著來自 王爾德的名作Ballad of Reading Gaol，鬼哭神嚎。

世上最殘忍的事莫過於此。

It Was Miserable :(

I haven’t written you any emails for 3 whole days.

It was miserable.

It was miserable to see you when you didn’t seem to be in the mood and I couldn’t do anything about it.

It was miserable that the cards I sent didn’t really make you happy but seemed to give you some kind of pressure instead.

It was miserable to see you leaving me without watching me going up the elevator at Shun Tak Centre.

It was miserable to try not to write you any emails because I’ve never stopped writing you emails for that long.

It was miserable to try not to check my gmail.

It was miserable for not hearing from you for 3 whole days. :(

音樂 - 陳黎

一個女兒
三十年後
回想這些﹕
她的父親
開車載她
一同上學
她在後座
聽他放的
音樂(
常常是她
正在苦練
的一些)
偶而夾雜
他清喉嚨
的聲音
三十年後
反覆彈奏
這些曲子
偶然閃現
錯誤音符
讓她覺得
似乎也是
可接受之
一種美
像她父親
一生顯現的
演奏樣式﹕
背德，出軌
在漫長的
嚴峻人生(1998‧3)

這詩，還令我想起法蘭仙納杜拉。

風箏 - 桓夫1922

是妳繫住我
咱們之間 才造成如此
分不開的關係------
任妳主宰
任妳擺佈
我仍然 高高在上
您緊緊
撐握著我的生命線
還煩惱什麼?
是不是握緊
怕我墮落自殺?
是不是放鬆
怕我斷奶高飛？
唯有風同情我
支持我向上
調節我的高度
越高 看的世界越廣
然而 你卻在風中
佈置暗線
牽制我
牽制我不要越境去愛雲

只要還生存，就有機會扮演不同角式，我到底是繫缐的人， 是風箏，是雲還是風？

夢遊女之歌 - 陳黎

我睡著，但我不知我已睡著
我活著，但我不知人生如夢

我閉著眼遊行地球，但我不知
我走在蛋殼之上
四周是光滑的夢的斷崖
引誘我粉身碎骨

我走到我的愛人床前
拿牙刷，沾牙膏，擦他的皮鞋
準備我們的誓約之旅
他睡著，他不知我們夜長夢多

我走到我的情敵窗前
封住她的窗簾，割斷她
公雞的喉，扭斷她鬧鐘的發條
但願她長睡不醒，永不見天日

我活著，但我不願靜靜活著
我睡著，但我不願就此睡著

二ＯＯ七．二

http://www.hgjh.hlc.edu.tw/~chenli/poetrymp3k.htm

Poem of Life - Author Unknown

Life is but a stopping place,
A pause in what's to be,
A resting place along the road,
to sweet eternity.
We all have different journeys,
Different paths along the way,
We all were meant to learn some things,
but never meant to stay...
Our destination is a place,
Far greater than we know.
For some the journey's quicker,
For some the journey's slow.
And when the journey finally ends,
We'll claim a great reward,
And find an everlasting peace,
Together with the lord.

人生是驛站，我們相遇、停靠一起，
或許我先走，或許您先行，
分道揚鑣以前，還是希望陪著您走，
據説走到路的盡頭，
就會找到甜美的永生，永恒的平安。

沒有您，永生如何平安、甜美？